Saturday, February 27, 2010

Perfect Shitting Tool for a Gadget Freak!

Do you remember what was it like to doing business 10 years ago? The handphones were as big as brick and we couldn't play "Happy Tree: Friend Slap Happy" with it. The irony is the price which costed about RM2k for a stupid mobile brick. Yes, there were a lot of public phones around, for instance, my block has 5 public phones though only one working. Cause only one was working the coin was always full, and heck, they collect the coins only once a month so it's as good as none. 
So we keep all the contact either in a diary or in the stuff between our ears. Then came this gadget: 

Ladies and gentleman this is called ELECTRONIC ORGANIZER. Man, I had to save like 3 months to have enough for this piece of shit. Basically you can store contacts (maximum 50), does currency conversion and there's even a calculator!  During that time, this is the most "in" product in the market and having none means you're barred from friendship. Everyone walks around pressing one of these. You may store your girl friend birthday in it but if you forget to read, it is as good as not storing at all. Amazing huh? But today we have this:

Well this one needs no introduction. Basically this piece of junk is capable of reminding you when to shit and where to shit properly. All you need to do is to download the apps from apple store. Oh ya, talking about shitting, I was cursing myself for not having a proper camera this morning when I was at Gurney Plaza. Guess what, one of my friend (Andy) actually selling bidet at the basement of a shopping mall. It is no ordinary bidet man....Introducing....The...Most....Advance.....Shitting MACHINE!

I had to use my camera phone, sad. What you can do with this toy is incredible, there are buttons to;
  1. warm the seat before you do your shit.  
  2. wash your arsehole with rotating water sprinkle.
  3. adjust the power of the sprinkle according to your favor. If your asshole is big you may need a bigger jet of water.  
  4. automated flushing system. 
  5. etc...
  6. etc...
  7. Hey Andy, can we cook instant noodle with it? 
Well, I think we actually can as reported by epicuriousgirl . Or is this the latest technology where the bidet can convert our shit into baked cheese rice? My god!



3 comments:

David said...

The Japanese Toilet is really a toilet bidet combination and although nice is also very expensive. You can keep your current toilet and get the same benefits by adding a hand bidet sprayer for very little cost. A hand held bathroom bidet sprayer is so much better than a stand alone bidet and this is why: 1. It's less expensive (potentially allot less) 2.You can install it yourself = no plumber expense 3. It works better by providing more control of where the water spray goes and a greater volume of water flow. 4. It requires no electricity and there are few things that can go wrong with it. Available at http://www.bathroomsprayers.com

Ryu Takeshi said...

Japanese Toilet is suitable for places with cold winters, I think. Otherwise, the normal (read : boring)one should suffice.

How Jun said...

Ya. The Japanese bidet is available all over Japan. There's hardly any normal bidet available.