Wednesday, June 19, 2013

Diary oh diary 18-6-2013

Today one of my friend came back from out station permanently and I managed to grab him for a karaoke session. In the name of catching up, I wanted the session for my own release. There's so much inside me that needed release. I have yet to find courage to tell anyone about what happened. Will doing that make any difference? 


It's like every sad songs were written for this moment. Every single songs have at least a single sentence or words that punched me deep into my heart. And my heart hurts a little when the words were coming out of my mouth. Through Facebook I saw people tagging photos of hers. Now it seems only from a far I can catch a glimpse of her life. What she's been up to. See if she's really smiling. 


Oh god, I'd exchange 10 years of my life just for another 10 days together with her. I have lost direction in life. I'm still struggling to convince myself that....it's over. And this is the time I'm on my knees, praying to god sincerely for strength. My spirit decays, for my beacon in life has been abandoned and extinguished. 


Diary oh diary, what would you do if you were me? What if you wanted to let go of the pain but it haunts you every seconds of you life? 

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