Saturday, June 8, 2013

Diary oh diary 8-6-2013

Bruno is right, if we were to leave somebody....we better leave some morphine at the door cause it'll take a whole lot of medication. It's not enough to think of her while waking, she came into my sleep. We were attending toastmasters meeting together again. Together as in together again. It was a sweet dream which I didn't want to wake up....but reality beats dreams anytime.

Some websites says, workout can help the situation. So I went to gym today. Worked the hell out of myself. Guess what, it didn't work. She was in my mind the whole time. The whole damn time. I'm tired.

And thus I took myself to a dinner place where she used to live. A place where we started. So much changes happened around that area. There were new terrace houses built nearby but the house she used to stay was still around. Less wild dogs nearby though. And things between us also changed. Our frequent-ed spot was where I dined. Ordered the usual soya drink with wan than mee. Life was much simpler then. We were young with not much achievements but at least we had each another. The traffic jam through and back was bad...reminding me that's exactly what I used to do, for her. I don't do that anymore. I've changed.

Looking at my mobile every 5 minutes seems like a routine exercise already. I want to know more about her now. She's working real hard recently...is her back hurting? Perhaps another reason why we failed is because I do not know how to express myself. If I wanted to see her, just tell her I wanted to see her. If i'm angry, just tell her I'm angry. I didn't do all those. It may sound silly and not logical but if I was given a wish, I want a time machine. I will appreciate her more, I'll appreciate people around me more, my friends, my parents and my brother.

Today I didn't get to hear her voice. But she replied my good night :)

Yes Bruno, you're right. She walked away...my eyes are just like the cloud now. Everyday it rains.

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